(Meanwhile in Washington, Andy Panda angrily enters the Oval Office at the White House where he finds a very glum-looking president.)

All right, Obama! I've had it with all these government intrusions! You need to shut down Panda Cam or shut down the whole government!
OBAMA: Hey, how'd you get past the Secret Service?

They were all distracted playing "World of Warcraft" on their Smartphones.
OBAMA: Geez, everybody's into that now. - Hey, leave me alone, okay. Let me wallow in my sorrows.

Huh? What's wrong?
OBAMA: What's wrong he says! Read a newspaper, will you? Website woes, Syria, NSA scandal, approval rating in the crapper.... I don't know why I bother anymore.

What's a newspaper? - Oh wait, I remember. Walter Lantz used to train me on those before I was ready for stardom.
(Suddenly Woody Woodpecker, Chilly Willy, and Oswald enter the room)

Hey, Andy, we thought we'd come along for moral support.

Not now. Obama's bummin' out.

Bumming out? For shame, Barack! Have you not seen my legendary B&W cartoon "Confidence"? (Probably on Youtube. Search for it.)
OTHERS: Confidence?

Yes, you remember! It took place during the Great Depression. My farm was sucking the big one, until I went to Washington and FDR told me all about Confidence! Then I went back home and injected a big needle full of Confidence into everyone. Their moods changed instantly and America lived happily ever after. The End.
OBAMA: And Confidence picked everyone up.

Sure. You'll notice FDR didn't need his wheelchair. (others gasp) - Oh, like I'm the only one who noticed that!

Well, the most important part was the injections.

That's right! So if we all inject needles into ourselves, soon we'll be so high we won't care anymore!

Woody, NO!
OBAMA: Actually I've been meaning to legalize that....

Don't you realize that it's our attitude that needs to change?
OBAMA: That's right. We lost most of our innocence after WW2. We lost what was left after JFK got shot. But we can get it back and make this country a better place! - Of course I'll still have to spy on you.

Oh, that's all right. My home page is Google, so I'm used to having no privacy.
OBAMA: So let's do this thing! Where's that Confidence needle, Oswald?

Well, time's have changed. There's no needle. Confidence is now available as an alcoholic beverage. (pulls out twelve-pack) Drink up, gang!
(Cut to two hours later. Andy, Woody, Chilly, Obama, and Oswald sit behind the desk with their arms around each other singing "Always look on the Bright Side of Life" from "Monty Python's Life of Brian".)
OBAMA: I'm feeling the Confidence now. - Hic - Michelle's gonna kill me for this.

This - hic - sure beats Wild Turkey for Thanksgiving.